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I leave the other notebook unfinished
a few blank pages left
maybe our story is finished
and thats fine
but what if just maybe
its not?
its delusional to hold onto that? or optimistic?
to rely on something atavistic
may very well be either
can it be seen as altruistic?
i thank you for you time and go away
have a good day
so i’ve moved on
remained strong
despite the prolonged
and unnecessary pain sustained
but who’s to blame?
who can say
my inflections are strange
as i rearrange
expectations
through deliberations
in revealing differences
and annotating new references
ignoring deference
ignoring reticence
____________________________
Are you listening?
Truly, I cannot be certain
As I try to peak behind the curtain
of your facade
so tell me
am I the broad
you wish to succeed
your aforementioned flames?
An assortment of colorful dames
no doubt
but I am not without
a personality like that horse of another color
a radiant creature like no other
so can you handle me at my best?
my unrelenting spirit
and casual persistence
as we do this modern dance
this flowery and go with the flow romance
and we accept the chance
that this may only be a summer dalliance
______________________________
_________________________
“it’s not about you”
because it’s not
maybe you realize that
maybe you don’t
but the things I’m assured of
have decreased in quantity
as I willingly admit
my naivety
but you don’t accept the gravity
of the consequences
of your limited responses
as they lend further reticence
and finally I’m not there
once you finally appreciate my presence
i’ve vanished into thin air
so fuck off and find another
like becky with the good hair
_____________________________
I’ll meet you there
I’ll see you there
wherever that may be
so when you tell me
we’re doing this
let’s actually do this
this , this, I don’t know what this is
but I like this
This, this, confusing
but alluring
charming yet annoying
mind blurring
heart racing
could i be tasting
something real
something real for now
maybe
somehow.
_____________________
Did I ever tell you you’re the sexiest?
let me put your worries to rest
you’re really the best
an incredibly sexy beast
on which my eyes love to feast
some may say its because of your height
other think its your fine behind thats nice and tight
but let me tell you, these things are just frosting
on the cake that is you
yes, i am charmed by the tree branches you have for arms
but what gets me the most turned on
and the basis for why I’m so fond
is your intellect
your mental state
the way we can debate
and how we so easily relate
and how you anticipate
my feelings , and reactions
and how they counter your actions
but we make peace with factions
and move towards points of relaxation
so wrap yourself around me
and i’ll succumb to your wit
and bit by bit
open up to each other
in ways more than physically lit
Whether of timing that was wrong
or an opportunity just gone
why do you still seem to reach beyond
you persist
and i do little to resist
the inversion of our pervasions
confused me and amused me
challenge accepted
despite being constantly rejected
so I dreamt of you
after not even seeing you
and i spent my thoughts on you
because how could i not
but be into you
you’re too affable
together we’re all too laughable
egging each other on
while not coming on too strong
because actually together?
we’re not.
despite what my heart has sought
are things between you and i
really all for naught?
is there a purpose?
to this half hearted circus?
our colorful robes
and mismatched clothes
coincide with our
with our reluctance to unify
rebel against the expected
continue on despite feeling rejected
instead focus on the time invested
there’s worth in our small moments
and i will collect them like tokens
you tell me to shh
you tell me not to be her
the loud one
the bold one
the one that comes undone
loose like a cannon
but if i want to sing rihannon
and belt into the night
letting my voice take flight
my words to breathe at new height
is that a possibility
can i lend myself to vulnerability ?
that shows the world what i really think
about things that lead me to the brink
the brink of my sanity
the different realms of realities
slowly receding
and as my heart is bleeding
i consider conceding
but to what duty
of what beauty
do i owe this world built on futility?
____________________
some like it hot
so drop that top
bare your chest
that golden summer glow is the best
forget the rest
the moment is now
you’re lovely
me too
so let’s have summer love
because we like it hot
and such fun
can’t be bought
__________________
the wordplay
the clever things you say
to make my fucking day
you’ve got me in such a way
whatever you want
i’m under your sway
so please
let me stay
stay in your arms tonight
hold me tight
love me tenderly
love me right
___
aggressive or retrospective?
i know how things have gone
sometimes right
sometimes wrong
forever some sort of forlorn love song
is that okay?
is that for the best?
what about the rest?
will my heart forever be bested?
is it too much what i have requested?
it’s green and then its red
but why for me is it always blue
a haze of cobalt days
a dream built on navy hues
and the desperation in your gaze
i want more of your words
more of your presence
its not me
that you see
its merely a reflection of what i could be
what i wish to be
come shower with me
come tower over me
be my stronghold
be my present to unfold
scoop me up
pull me in
as i lather soap over your skin
and we truly begin
to see each other
to feel each other
how have we gone so long
without one another?
go down on me
surround me
astound me
subtly profound
astutely wound
to be newly rounded
lead me to be numb
and utterly dumbfounded
___________
out of touch
too in touch
maybe i am too much
too strong
too weak
can i help it if my soul needs to speak?
how to live your life on a dare?
dare me to live fully
dare me to give wholly
everything i can
in this one life span
that is mine
Mr right now
mr right timing
the clock be slow to winding
please
stop everything for this moment now
let me show you how
you can go inside my panties with your mind
slip inside my wet walls
listen to my voice and it rises and falls
let me be your canvas
paint magic on my skin
and sink sink sink
deeper and deeper in
_________________
moments with you
tokens of you
collected, this myriad
coins from around the world
you heard my herald
you saw me spin
and for right now, you win
me, exactly as I am, a prize
quite a feast for your eyes
so take me all in
let the caressing begin
run your fingers across my soft layers
and peel them away, as the night gets later
as you stimulate me intellectually
and I can’t help but want you sexually
and you say all the right things
pull all the right strings
and the beads of our conversation are strung
one topic leading naturally to the other
and we inhale deeply into our lungs
the herbal remedy of which many songs are sung
on and on and around we go
and you have me spun
_______________________
give me that hardness
that goes along with this naked recess
as you kiss this hot mess
you do your best
to please the man in the boat
and when you make him finally cum
you gloat
at my face twisted in pleasure
what a fantastic way to pass time of your leisure
and so you ensure
that i’ll keep coming back
for more, more fun
of the sinful sort
and for you i will contort
and let you ride
and dive
into my waters
you can wade
and we’ll have relayed
my hand on your baton
hurry up and put your sheath on
and then please penetrate me
with your sword of a hard on
________________________
not my husband
you hold me while
I unfold me
you’re a step in a very different direction
and as you get to know me
section by section
I feel the space
with constant reflection
I feel the now
ignore the how
drive the road endowed
with secret places
now said out loud
and independent feelings ignited
my choices, my life
with magic fuel I am flighted
a mysterious energy of your pull
motivating me to go full
full throttle on this
midwestern encounter of a dalliance
because, perchance
you’re one I can be someone with
or perhaps
this is a short lived albeit passionate romance
of a new experience
that we can both learn from
and be there for each other
through this new process
and make this also a nude protest
of clandestine connections
and body to body sensual revelations
will you be the man to help me embrace the new me?
the I’m going after happiness me?
let me casually rock your cock while you moan with me
And we seize the moments as they cum
and we cum
together we set aside an importance
of ignoring the reluctance
to go for what feels good
despite not making sense
refute the presence of energy tense
and put ourselves out there
to see what’s there
because, fuck, I think I do care
Man in a boat
Man with a boat
Captain of my ship
as we lock lip to lip
bite to being bit
lick from nip to nip
sip while I taste
your girth and your curvature
and you relish in the contact of my wet nurture
on your bristled face
and we ride waves
that push us to more intensely collide
my space
into your space
and on your stature
I felt my body relied
relied on you to hold me still
relayed to you my need to be filled
filled with your length
enter the space
between my length
as the light fades
and we continue to rocking
as the water is breaking
we roll and twist to the energy in the air
about anything else we don’t care
these love making moon children
they’re own groove they’ve been given
and now they have finally found in the other
a little slice of moonlit heaven
bday sex
put to the test
better than all the rest
make my hairs a mess
topsy turvy are my sheets
as we bump and grind on repeat
and you eat
eat my sweet silky softness
and i give your nips the subtle caress
of my licked lips
push me pull me
i’ll let you control me
as we moan you remind me
of what it is to be purring
toes curling
as you lend to my pleasure
and i take you in
measure by measure